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| A Bloody Past... A Bloody Future?; a journal | |
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| Topic Started: Jul 1 2009, 02:45 AM (24 Views) | |
| Darius | Jul 1 2009, 02:45 AM Post #1 |
lurking..
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Yesterday, when visiting my mother, she handed me this small red journal and told me she found it while cleaning. I recognized the handwriting as mine and was baffled. Since when did I ever keep a journal? I could not recall ever having had one. It was completely full. I flipped through memories and descriptions from my youth, what seemed like eons ago, for hours. It was odd and interesting. So I decided I would start another, though nothing too exciting is going on to describe, but maybe eventually there will be. One thing to note: I am leaving my homeland. I have done all there is do to and see. I am a wanted man, so I figure it would benefit me anyway to leave. My cult members will be sad to see me go (because I will tell them to be) but then... they will realize that they are free and be just fine. They were not really worth the trouble anyway. My mother is very sad about it, but my father says he could care less. I honestly would not know if he is being truthful or not when he says that. Oh well. According to him, all his children are utter failures anyway, though it is obviously that in reality only Mirthea is. I am glad to know I will not see her bring a child into the world, if it is even possible... which so far seems unlikely. I have heard talks of this place called 'Avalon'. It is due east, for several weeks. I am not a huge fan of long rides on ships, but no matter. I have enough coin. Perhaps I shall find more easily corrupted souls here in that new land? Perhaps I shall achieve my goal there, my ultimate want... But probably not. Maybe I should just forget about it? I did spend centuries trying to accomplish the same thing in my homeland, but to no avail. No, if I give up on this now... for what would I be traveling for? Nothing. I feel I have lived a rather full and long life. I could meet my end soon and be just fine, if not for that nagging feeling that this cult thing... it is just something I must do. I do not know anymore. Tomorrow I leave. |
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| Darius | Jul 7 2009, 03:57 AM Post #2 |
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lurking..
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Of course, when the pirates stole all of my belongings, they took both my journals as well. It is a bit discouraging... It makes me not want to write anymore. Bastards. So I found myself yet another blank book to write in. So far, Avalon has been extremely inviting. I do not suppose I will forget my first night here, so there is no need to write of it. But of course, I only just had been on the Isle of Mist. I am not sure exactly when I shall travel further away. She asked me today if I were a murderer. I am not sure exactly why she was asking, but I replied simply yes. She need not know the extent of the blood I have shed. Not that I think it would change her opinion of me much... I would just rather not get into it as it would take quite some time to tell her of all the slayings. They all had a reason behind them though, I assure you. I am not one to just mindlessly kill. I am not one to just mindlessly do anything, actually. Being something that has lived for centuries, obviously these just killings would add up. They were all for my cause, all for the ultimate goal - my future. Here is hoping I will have more success here in Avalon then I did in my homeland. I got as close as I could there. Assassinating a king was really not something I wanted to get myself tied into, but I knew the longer I stayed there and thought about it... the easier my conscious would be swayed to murder that king. My conscious, ha! A demon with a conscious! Of course, I am only half demon, but still. I have not regretted a single killing I have done. Does that not make me without a conscious? Never mind. I ramble. I shall change my approach this time. There is much research to be had. And since this place took my powers away... there is much training to me had as well. In time, I will follow through with my plan. I am not sure if she would agree to such a plan. No matter. She is mine, anyway. It does not matter if she agrees or not. I am not sure what reminded me, but earlier when I walked the street I felt extremely uncomfortable and I realized it was because people were glancing at me. It is very odd not being one with the shadows any longer. How dare this place take that from me? I am worthy of it and if anyone tells me different, I would perhaps kill them. The darkness is mine; the shadows are mine to lurk in. I hated people staring at me as I went about my business. A bit of self-consciousness on my part, I think. [Issues, Korn.] |
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2:20 AM Mar 13
